Unfortunately, first impressions are lasting impressions, and quite a bitch if i don’t say so myself. It only takes a couple seconds for another person to evaluate and square you up. That is why the handshake is so important. Your handshake defines who you are.

I am involved with the military and do a lot of advocacy with non-profits. I have shaken hands with the average Joe, to politicians, high ranking officers, and even entrepreneurs and millionaires. So i have had my fair share of handshakes. Are you a “Limp Fish” or are you “Confident”. Unfortunately I encounter more of the “Limp Fish” when meeting Hmong people.

There are three keys to a successful handshake:

1. How you do it
2. When you do it
3. Where to do it

Continue reading this article at HmongMen.com

What happened in 2011 and what stood out most for you? 18XEEM looks back on a year of loss, triumphs and most discussed stories of 2011! Tell us what you think in the comments area below, or let us know what else should have made our Top 10.

1. Former leader General Vang Pao dies on January 6 and a statue is unveiled to commemorate his life on December 28. TIME magazine names Vang Pao one of the “TIME’s People Who Mattered in 2011“
2. Hmong National Conference resumes after a year on hiatus in St. Paul, MN on April 22
3. Brothers Abel Vang and Burlee Vang Win 2011 Motion Picture Academy Fellowship.
4. Thousands of Christian Hmong protestors demand religious freedom in Vietnam
5. Phagna Touby Lyfoung honored at Lao, Hmong and American Veteran Memorial on May 30 in Sheboygan, WI
6. Fresh Traditions holds successful fashion show for the fifth year in a row on October 7
7. Jerry Yang releases book “All In” in July
8. Non-Hmong singing contestant wins big at Hmong New Year in Fresno, CA
9. Community members rally at KDWB Studio on April 15 in response to racist remarks made on the radio show
10. All-star high school football players featured in Sports Illustrated’s November issue

“Activities like these give the community an opportunity to compete in a productive manner and allow for different ethnic groups to come together to interact on another level. The HHH organization has consistently provided athletic support to the youth and continues to extend its help to all those wanting to participate in sporting events.” –Bee Her, President of HHH, a youth-led sports organization

Bee Her

Being the oldest of five sons to Nhia Cheing Her and Yer Lee, I was born in Santa Ana, CA. By the time I was five years old, my family moved to Pennsylvania where we lived for a short period of time then settled in Michigan. I met my wife, Nancy Moua, in high school and have been married to her for 13 years.

Growing up I always had a passion for sports especially basketball, football, and soccer. Not only do I participated in sports –I also organize and host basketball tournaments for the Asian community. In 1998, my brother-in-law, Nong Lee, and I started our very own soccer team named “Broncos.” Our very first victory was at the 2002-2003 Hmong Michigan New Year in Lansing.

In 2005, my friends, Tony Yang and Johnny Lee and I created the Hmong flag football team “East Coast Scorpions” when it was still a fairly new sport to the Hmong Michigan community. I eventually became a captain and continue to carry the team to this day.

The sporting events that we organized would not have been possible without the help of my family and friends. In 2006, wanting these competitions to become annual events, we decided to come together and start “Hmong Haib Heev Community Organization” or “HHH” for short. I was elected President of our organization. Our mission is to build unity in the Asian community by hosting sporting events to keep teens and young adults stay off the streets.

Our goal one day is to have our own community center to provide after school programs, curricular activities, and sports for children, teens, and young adults We also hope to provide available space for Hmong elders, as they play a big role in shaping our youth community.

In addition to participating in HHH, I also volunteer with non-profit organizations such as Great Lakes Hmong Association and Hmong of Oakland County Association.

My hope is that the Hmong community and its organizers will continue to come together and build a strong relationship to help guide and teach one another.

WANT TO SEE YOUR ORGANIZATION FEATURED IN 18XEEM? Use this form to send us your organization’s bio.

Model wearing outfit from Once Upon A Time Collection by Kao Lee Thao, Photo by Yeng Yang

Friday, October 7, 2011 – Minneapolis, MN The Center for Hmong Arts and Talent (CHAT) held the Fresh Traditions V Fashion Show (FTV) at the beautiful McNamara Alumni Center in Minneapolis, Minnesota. FTV is an annual fashion show featuring all Hmong fashion designers and Asian models.

Each designer is given creative control over their collections, with one exception. Because there is little documentation as to why the unique palette of traditional Hmong fabrics were used, designers are challenged to make sense of the traditional fabrics in today’s contemporary world.

They are all required to design at least one full outfit using a combination of the 5 Hmong fabrics: black satin, black velvet, neon green chiffon, florescent pink chiffon and a royal blue satin.

As the doors opened at 6pm, the line at the entrance quickly filed out into the hallway and the room filled with excitement and curiosity for this year’s 5 featured designers. With only an hour left before the show, attendees were entertained by DJ Luchie’s music spinning in the background.

At the stroke of 7pm, the VIP audiences quickly got into their seats as the general audiences pushed their way as close to the runway as possible. Katie Ka Vang, Director of Navigate at CHAT, came from behind the curtains in a red and gold Chinese dress and a floral-feathered hairpiece that made just the right statement of high fashion for an event like FTV.

“Is everyone excited?!” Katie screamed at the audience. She received a buzzing response that confirmed a positive answer to her question. With that the fashion show began.

FTV opened with a video that set the mood of enchantment while a beautiful woman appeared and danced among weeping willow trees. Next was the introduction video from the first designer, Sai Chang featuring her collection, Essee.

“Sai’s collection, Essee, is designed for the woman who enjoys the simple things in life, but also want to look fresh, edgy and fashionable.” Influenced by both hip hop and punk rock, Sai was able to deliver the look as her models walked the runway with an upbeat, fun and fierce determination. The Essee collection was a mix of black, white and occasionally pink accents. Sai successfully executed a look that combined sporty, sexy and rebellious elements.

The next designer was Marlena Thao with the Bombshell Collection. “Marlena’s vision and concept was inspired by the 1940’s pin-up girls. She wanted to accentuate the female figure with sultry yet flattering garments.” The Bombshell Collection had a summery pastel pallete with floral prints –a sweet contrast from Essee’s bold black and white. Besides the feminine appeal, each of Marlena’s outfits offered versatility as each model walked the runway twice, showing two different looks in one – such as reversible pieces, a skirt that transformed into a hooded cape, and a mini ensemble that turned into a full-length dress.

Fresh Traditions V Fashion Show, Photos by Yeng Yang

[Show as slideshow]

The third designer was Dokiang Thao, the only out-of-state designer from Madison, WI with her bITTERsWEET Collection. “bITTERsWEET originates from the girl who loves tea parties and lipstick, but is a risk-taker, someone who loves to stand out and is not afraid to get her hands dirty.” Dokiang’s collection delivered a “hardcore” feeling of rawness as each model walked out with asymmetrical Mohawk hairdos carrying a large lollipop as a prop. The innocent deviance was even more emphasized by the dark black and green fabrics she used with her short and body-hugging designs.

Next was designer, Ashaley Yang with the Color Me Beautiful Collection. “The design focus is to embrace females with larger structures encompassing bright and bold colors to contrast with an edge of drama.” Ashaley is the first FT designer to design for the fuller-figured woman. She designed full-length dresses using free-flowing fabrics in daring colors that her models wore with confidence and elegance.

The final and most dramatic designer of the show was Kao Lee Thao with the Once Upon A Time Collection. Kao Lee’s line was a collection of wearable art that demonstrated her talents to go beyond the brush and canvas. Already having an established reputation as an amazing painter, Kao Lee’s collection was an extension of her imagination as she brought to life characters from Hmong folktales. Starting with a theatrical opening, her required pieice, the “Hmong Warrior”assassins an orphan boy. The Once Upon a Time collection was a dramatic ending to the entire show.

The Fresh Traditions Fashion Show’s unique format of allowing each designer their own creative team and models makes for 5 different fashion shows in one event. As the show came to a conclusion, there was a clear desire to see more. There were cameras flashing and offerings of congratulations and admiration as people eagerly approached designers and models that made their way from the backstage to join the audience after the show.

With the wide range of styles from this year’s designers, FTV left audiences with an up-lifing impression of great things to expect for the future of fashion.

Subscribe to 18XEEM’s print publication for in-depth coverage and interviews with featured designers in the next issue. To see more photos, videos and reactions to CHAT’s Fresh Traditions V Fashion Show, go to www.freshtraditionsfashion.com or visit their facebook page.

Center for Hmong Arts and Talent exists to nurture, explore and illuminate the Hmong American experience through artistic expressions.

Dr Ia Kue at her office, Photo by CVPix

Why are we here? What is the process of getting to medical school? What is it like to be a medical student? What does it take to become a doctor? These were some of the questions that Dr. Ia Kue helped answer and facilitate during a Future Doctors Gathering in her humble home for a group of eager students currently pursuing the medical field. “It’s a long, difficult, and sometimes lonely journey that takes a lot of dedication, sacrifice, and determination to get to.”

With this in mind, Dr. Kue, came up with a meeting to bring Hmong students from all over Michigan to discuss and share their experiences, in hopes of helping them get through this rigorous educational procedure. If there is anyone who has the most knowledge on what it is like struggling through medical school to attain a professional career, while juggling other cultural and social activities, only to make it out in the end, as successful and as enlightened as never before, it would be Dr. Kue.

Dr. Kue is the first female Hmong osteopathic medical student in the United States, the first female Hmong Family and Osteopathic Physician in Michigan and the first to open and manage her own clinic: Lifetime Family Care, PLLC. She is a pioneer in Hmong women leadership, not because of these numerous accomplishments, but because of her perseverance and determination in higher education and empowering youth to live their dreams. Some of the things she shared with us while we sat in her office were extremely heartwarming, and it showed through that she is a dedicated,hardworking and genuine person. Her gentle voice revealed that she was a caregiver, not just to her kids, but also to her patients, in always being compassionate and thoughtful about their well-being.

“It took me 13 years to get started here. I remember when I first started going to medical school, all of the older ladies were saying, why do you want to do this? You have kids, and you are a nyab. You should just stay home and let your husband work. A lot people were unsure of our decision. But after we finished, people came up to us and they apologize to us and admitted that this was the right thing.”

THE INTERVIEW:
18XEEM: When you were a little girl did your parent’s expect you to become a doctor? DK: No… because they didn’t know any better, as far as what we could do or what potentials we had. My dad is a proponent of education, so he is always emphasizing education. What type of education –he didn’t know, he just wanted us to finish high school and at least go to college, that was what they kept enforcing. But as far as going to medical school, no I don’t think that they ever dreamt that this could be a possibility, nor did I.

When you and your family moved to the US, how did you cope with learning to speak and write the English language at the age of 8? What was your motivation? I was the oldest of 5 kids, my parents spoke no English, and similarly to a lot of people, I just had to learn it because I was interpreting for them… when we’d go shopping or the doctor’s office. I was forced to learn it in a way, and that’s what motivated me to learn it quicker than probably my siblings. Because it was do or die, you know. We were sponsored by a church in Illinois, there were maybe 4 other Hmong families around the area, so I was always surrounded by friends who were not Hmong. I joined clubs in school, played in a jazz band, and so those things helped me to learn English faster.

You married at a very young age, 17; do you think things would have been different if you didn’t marry young? Definitely, things would be different, because who knows whom I’d end up with or what that life situation would be like, but I’ve always loved school. Even if I didn’t get married at that age, I would have continued to pursue something in school. When I dropped out of 10th grade my teachers were very disappointed, because I had a grade point average of 3.9 and worked really hard to get there. When I got married, it just kind of ended; my dad was also very disappointed. But he made my husband promise that I would go back to school and at least get some sort of degree. And so my husband agreed that he would send me to school.

As a Hmong woman, what was one of the biggest challenges you faced in your life? I think that I was very lucky, though there are challenges. I was lucky because when I married my husband,his parents were very supportive of my education too so that automatically relieved a lot of pressure there. I think one of the biggest challenges with all Hmong women is to trying to be a good nyab (wife), a good mother, have lots of kids for your parents, to be able to provide for your family, and at the same time pursue what you want to do and not compromise that. If you want to continue being a domestic Hmong woman, and at the same time you want have a career, then your responsibilities double. If you want to be one or the other its okay, but most of the time, I fought really hard to be the best at both and that made it more complicated. At times I felt that I couldn’t, and I was disappointed because of that, but I tried my best and left the rest to God. I wouldn’t have done it any other way.

What was one of the biggest sacrifices you had to make in getting this far, and how did you go about making that decision? I think the biggest sacrifice I had to make was my family. I had to go to school at Michigan State and I had to leave them for 2-3 days at a time. That was a huge sacrifice. I remember the first whole semester, when I used to drive to school I would be so broken hearted about leaving my family that I would cry all the way driving from home to Michigan State. It was also challenging for my husband and kids.

In addition to that, I also had to sacrifice a lot of my friends, because all I had time for was school and family. I didn’t have any time for anything else. A lot of my peers at that time were all housewives and they worked and they were happy with that. I tried to convince them to go to school with me too but really nobody else was interested so I just kept pushing by myself. At the same time, I tried to keep my family in line with me along the way. I didn’t want to lose them behind. Every step of the way I would keep them up to date. I would call my husband everyday and let him know what I was doing, where I was at and I’d write to my kids everyday from school or I would call and talk to each of one of them and ask how school was –if they were sick or doing okay. The key thing for me was having constant communication with them. They came to visit me often, if I didn’t come home within 2-3 days, they would make a trip up there or if I had exams on Mondays and I couldn’t come home on the weekends, they would stay with me on the weekends.

My parents and all my siblings were such a huge support, helping every way they could. When I did come home –the free time that I had, I spent with my kids. I taught my girls how to play the piano, so that was our time together. That was my way of trying to balance my life, but I really had no life outside of that. Since our kids were little, we have set a day where we have family time together so every Friday night is family night… even now that they are teenagers they won’t go out with their friends because they know its family night on Friday’s. Every Sunday night, we have a family meeting night. That was another way we kept our family together.

Recently, you did a presentation on the book, “The Spirit Catches you and You Fall Down”.  As a Hmong and a Doctor, do you see yourself in the same shoes as the parents of the patient, or the doctors of the patient? I would say that I would be that person who stands in the crossroad between two cultures. It’s really neat to be in that position because you can see everything that is going on on both sides; on the parent’s side as well as the medical side. I can’t really say one or the other. I believe that her [Lia’s] parents did the best they could as parents; with the limited knowledge they had in medicine to take care of Lia. They loved her.

On the other side, her pediatricians also did the same; they were limited because they didn’t understand the culture, but from a medical point of view, they did their best. The flaw was that they didn’t take the time to understand the parents and that made a huge difference. No matter how smart they were,how much time they sacrificed, because they missed that small piece –that knowledge into the culture, it made the world a difference in the way things turned out. They were, as one of the doctors said, ‘excellent physicians but imperfect healers’because their world view was the opposite of their patients and they just couldn’t identify with them. It was a tough situation on both sides.

Do you find yourself in that position sometimes while working with patients of other cultural backgrounds? Yes, I do and it is very tough. Even with me being Hmong, its very hard for my Hmong patients to adhere to their treatment regime. For example if they have high blood pressure, I would give them enough medication for 3 months, sometimes I don’t see them for another 6 months or a year later, when they are having symptoms. However, things are changing, as I’m able to spend more time in educating them.

More importantly, they are starting to see the consequences of uncontrolled diseases in the Hmong community, so awareness has definitely increased adherence. It is a challenge for all health workers when working with a culture whose world view of illness is so different than our own. But I think that if we focus on what we have in common as people and respect each other for our differences, then we can overcome many barriers. I’m finding that doing what is right (from a medical perspective) is not always the best initial step. The most important thing is building a firm relationship. It is extremely important to gain that trust and respect from your patients first. They want to know that you actually care about their health –I think this ultimately breaks all cultural barriers and only then can you provide services to your patients. Because of this, I’ve actually learned a few Polish words to try to impress my Polish patients…who usually just giggle at me.

How do you deal with patients when they don’t take your word for it? I believe that you can never force a patient to do what they don’t want to do, regardless of their cultural background. My job is to educate them about their illness, provide them with options, and then provide them with my recommendations. Then it’s pretty much up to them. If it is a difficult decision then I give them my best judgment by suggesting something like, “if I were in your situation… this is what I would do,” but I never guarantee the outcome. Once I feel that they are well knowledgeable with the situation, they can make the decision that’s best for them. Sometimes I’ll talk to their daughter, or their parents, or someone they trust and respect to get them to encourage and support their family member in making the best decision.

Where do you see the future of the Hmong community going in terms of our history, culture and language? I think we can look at the Hmong communities at large and we can see that Hmong people have progressed very fast. Within the last 30 years, we have had people who’ve gone on to higher education, or have their own businesses. We have come very far and will continue to grow if the people who have accomplished what they have accomplished will reach back to the community and the young people; I think that will help them to catch up. I do also see a generation of –for lack of a better word, a lost generation of youth. I think that we –those of us who have gone forward, need to spend a lot of energy to try and wake up our youth, instill within them dreams, and remind them where their parents came out of. My parents were always telling me, “We want a better life for you, we don’t want you to have the kind of life that we did.” I saw that kind of life –where they came from and the struggles, it is a big motivation for me to keep pushing forward. I want our young people to see that too. I want them to know that it doesn’t matter where they are at; if they want to pursue their dreams… it is very possible.

As a leader in your community, what is the one thing that you would want others to learn from you and apply it to what they are doing in their lives? Find something that you are gifted in and do what you love to do and be excellent at what you do. There are four things that will help you get there, and I call them the four D’s: Determination, Discipline, Discernment, and Dedication. Those are the things that will lead you to your Dream (which is actually the first to start with: to have a dream, a goal or a target to hit). I want our young people to know that each one of us, has a purpose for our existence. Once we find out what that is, then life begins. I believe that the God who created us would be very disappointed if we just wasted our lives away.

“The four D’s: Determination,Discipline, Discernment, and Dedication. Those are the things that will lead you to your Dream.”

To the Hmong women out there, whether they are married or not, they can do both. They just have to sacrifice a bit more. But I want and hope to see more women becoming more independent and at the same time be able to maintain the humble role as a Hmong wife and mother. To be able to make decisions with their children, to be a good role model for their family and also for our community.

What was your inspiration?
Traditional Hmong Costumes and High Fashion.

Do your designs have any functions/unique aspects to it?
Hmong Reinvented is a fashion line that represents and bridges the gap between being Hmong and being American. In my designs I use Hmong embroidery with western silhouettes. I want to make wearing Hmong clothes fashionable. My motto is: Forget about the layers, the heavy money belts and bags. Keep it simple and chic.

How long does it take you to finish one piece?
Depending on how complicated the garment can get and how much time I have to work on it, it could take a few days up to a month.

Who would you want to wear this piece?
I think “tweens” to adults would really appreciate wearing my designs because of the stylish silhouettes, new interesting lines in design and the incorporation of traditional Hmong elements. I want to cater to the Hmong community, as well as branch out to the mainstream market.

How much does it cost?
Full outfits can range from $150 – $300 depending on design patterns and materials.

Where can we get it?
I am currently working on a website, but you can always look at my work on lylena.deviantart.com/. If you see anything you like, just leave me a note and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. I am always working on new designs and orders for other people. Please understand I make everything myself so it can take a month or more to get a garment to you.

“You know that time of the year when your mom pulls out the luggage of clothes she’s packed away for a year? You know what I’m talking about, the heavy luggage that you secretly hoped had miraculously disappeared in the closet or under the bed? Yes, it’s Hmong New Year and you feel obligated to wear the heavy, burdensome clothes again. We’ve all been there, it doesn’t matter if you’re Green, White, Striped, Black Hmong, etc. We all go through the same process –the hours of getting everyone dressed and the madness of the mess afterwards. Wouldn’t it just be easier if we could have something simple and fashionable?  To answer that question, I created Hmong Reinvented… my fashion line of traditional Hmong costumes with a western touch. In keeping with tradition, I left as much of the original silhouette as I could, altering the neckline, the sleeves, the skirt and the layers as I went. In the end we have garments that are clearly Hmong, but very sexy and easy to wear. Not only have I updated traditional Hmong costumes, but I am also putting a little bit of Hmong into ready-to wear garments”.

Where did you grow up and what school did you attend?
Fresno, California / University of California, Davis (Bachelor of Science in Textiles and Costumes)

What inspired you to get into fashion?
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been drawing and dancing. I grew up drawing on my mom’s magazines. Going to traditional Hmong dance practice was mandatory since my mom was the dance teacher. Dance performances were the worst –I always threw up. I never figured out if I was nervous or my layers were smoldering me. In high school, I had enough with tradition and started a hip-hop dance group where I first combined my passion for drawing and dancing by designing our dance costumes. Then, going away for college was great! I got to discover myself and found a family away from home with the UC Davis Hmong Student Union, a Hmong club on campus. Being with them brought me closer to my roots. I went away for college to get into medical school, but came out with a BS in Costume and Textiles. I took up traditional Hmong dancing again and taught a few girls in the club. Most of us were away from home and couldn’t get traditional Hmong costumes, plus our parents weren’t too trusting of a group of teens with all those money bags. This was the first time I started to redesign Hmong costumes as well as try a hand at sewing. Once I started sewing my own designs, I couldn’t stop, I had found something I was incredibly passionate about –something I could see myself doing day in and day out and would never get tired of. I quickly got into the Design program at UC Davis and since then I have never turned back. My professors were wonderfully supportive. During my last two years in college, my designs were more theatrical and experimental. However, I didn’t really explore Hmong clothing again until a professor really encouraged me to do it for my senior project. I showcased four Hmong Reinvented garments that year for the Senior Fashion Show. It was incredible seeing my creations on the runway. Since then, I have continued to sew for family members and I’m slowly getting myself noticed in a few online communities. My largest commission so far has been for the “Nkauj Hmoob Yaj Yuam” dance group here in Sacramento, California.

What does it mean to be Hmong to you?
Being Hmong is being proud of your people, embracing your culture, speaking the language, learning the traditions and never forgetting who you are or trying to hide from it.

What are your goals/ aspirations?
My short-term goal is to have a booth at the Hmong New Year next year to test the waters and if all goes well, to open up a store of my own. I would love to be a high fashion designer and a common household name, but until then, I want to come out with something new and daring that hopefully the Hmong will appreciate and support.

Read The GVP Phenomenon, originally published on Feb 10, 2010.

In an effort to bring you quality content and amazing details in cultural photography and design, 18XEEM will now be published as an annual publication. Any previous subscriptions will be honored prior to this update until subscription renewals are required. All future subscriptions will be billed at $5 per issue. Our next issue will resume printing in 2011. Thanks again for all your support. Any questions about your subscription should be sent via our contact form.

We apologize for any inconveniences.

Sincerely,

Hlee Xiong

Editor-in-Chief